it's okay (mediocre)

those words i spoke
when my soul was flying
and
when my heart was breaking

those words i mouthed
filling the air
with lies.

i have traveled so incredibly far.
i've come so far.
i am not who i was
and i do not want
what i wanted.

i realized what i needed is not what i need
...what i wanted is not what i want

to satiate my thirst takes more than a mere drop of rain
to assuage my pain takes more than a mere pill
from a bottle of placebo

is it okay
that i don't need you anymore?

you used me up
you kept my heart at your command
and i was utterly yours
loyal like the stupid puppy i was

is it okay
that i don't need you anymore?

is that okay?

i cross out your name
where i traced it in the sand
i 'x' over that place in my heart
that room reserved for you.

for the first time in a long time
i have heard the sigh
the slow intake of breath
coming from my chest
i quiet my mind and can
hear the dull pound that sets
the meter of my gait

is it okay?
its okay that i don't need your
words
to fill up that hunger inside
and
its okay that i can see past my nose
without your guiding hand.

my head is no longer inclined
to the sound of your voice
the blind can see now
that she was never blind at all.

it is okay
that i don't need you anymore.